Many people have made poor past decisions in their lives that may or may not have affected many people.
Self-friending to yourself is coming to grips with the past and realizing that past is just that. The complications we add are continual second-guessing about what we did or didn’t do in the past. We struggle with our past mental stories & don’t see the present. We talk about ourselves as in a should have or shouldn’t have manner. We are sad and we are not sure how to change. This is unproductive regret.
The goal we need to work on is telling the story about the past as part of the path that has led to the present. It involves owning your choices & experiences and learning from them vs. drowning in them. It is owning the fact that you are sad or angry and using that as a motivator to experience emotions that you are entitled to such as joy & contentment now.
At this point, the present is a new story with you as the author ….