Grief Counseling
Are you having a hard time letting go and moving forward after a loss?
“I feel it could have been prevented.”
“I talked to them every day.”
“How will I go on without them?”
When we lose something or someone that is part of our lives, it is like feeling lost and cannot figure out what to do. It is a feeling of being unable to even think straight. We have all lost someone or something that meant so much to us. We have all felt the pain of loss. The time we each take to grieve and begin to live again without that which we have lost is different for each of us. Some of the process depends on how you felt about life & death, how you grew up believing what the process is.
Questions we have about whether anything could have prevented the loss of a loved one are something we have to come to terms with as we go through the grief stages. We ask questions, we go over timelines and question if we did all we could. We talk to others, read the internet, read books and talk to medical professionals to try to learn all we can. Eventually, we think about how we talked to someone everyday whether that was in person, a phone call, a text or facetime. What will we do now? The answer is we go on even though we are not sure how.
Time heals, we heal, and we move forward. What you are feeling is normal as you navigate through a loss.
Have any questions? Send me a message!
We all experience grief in our own way
Grief takes many forms - sorrow, heartbreak, loss, pain, guilt – and can also be seen as a natural part of life.
I can say, we never talked about it in my family, and it would just happen. It was not until I was much older and experienced grief again was I truly able to put it into a spot in my life and still live my life. Along the way meeting people who did talk about it in their families as they grew up and saw death in a quite different & positive way did give me new perspective. It did not change my pain, but it seemed to make it less heavy for me.
There are many books and articles on death. The Five Stages of Change by Elisabeth Kubler-Ross will always be the staple of defining the five steps as denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and acceptance. There are also the three C’s of navigating grief; choose, connect and communicate. Regardless of all the information for us to read, it is how we travel through grief. How we feel every day and eventually learn to continue.
Another type of grief that can be a long-lasting experience if you have an illness or have been a caretaker for someone else who has an illness. Being a caretaker has so many mixed emotions, sometimes hopeful, sometimes you are already in the grief process. Caretakers give and give everything. They must put aside their needs to be there for someone else. They do not know what each day will bring, but they continue to do what needs to be done. For instance, taking care of a parent who once took care of you in some way is a life changing experience.
Grief is something we all experience.
One of the last steps of grief is acceptance. Acceptance is also called finding meaning. Finding meaning , the 6th stage of grief by David Kessler takes navigating grief one step further. The finding meaning stage involves finding a way to sustain the memory of the lost loved one, continuing their legacy, and discovering a new sense of purpose in life despite the loss. I feel this last stage really is where I “moved on” after experiencing a loss. I really felt a need to tell my loved one’s story, what they loved, enjoyed, and spent time doing. One question that I feel is important to ask yourself, what about the person who is gone is part of who you are? How can you create something positive from this? It could be creating friendships with monthly get-togethers with friends, making sure you call someone who maybe isn’t calling you as much as they should or just saying hi to people you pass by every day.
Grief stage No. 7 – Who do we become?
In my experience with life & grief counseling, “who you become” is the most meaningful stage. All our experiences with others, walking down the path of life with them when we are without them, we continue. It’s important for counseling to help you on this journey.
My approach with grief therapy is helping you toward healing, providing a safe space to talk about the person or pet or even a way of life that is no longer with us. You can expect a shared time of being able to express what their presence meant to you is essential in honoring their memory and finding peace.
Grief therapy can also provide some positive outcomes for you such as learning to problem solve, letting go of self-defeating thoughts, focusing on values, feeling less anxious and accepting difficult emotions without judgment. Also, if there was an ambiguous relationship with someone that has passed, working through those emotions is possible with counseling.
While we may not think about these things when someone is with us or when we have a beloved pet, healing begins when we acknowledge their significance and the impact they had on our lives.
Counseling guides us on a path to healing, helping us redefine what our loss means to us now and integrating it into our present reality alongside cherished memories.
Are Considering Grief Counseling But Still Are Unsure?
Are there stages of grief?
Yes, there are stages of grief, but each person's journey is unique. Depending on your situation, you may have been more prepared for what was to come. I would not say we all go through the stages in order. Counseling is particularly helpful in navigating these transitions and finding ways to move forward.
How do I help others in my family with grief ?
Counseling can help you determine the best approach based on your family dynamics, individual relationships, and shared loss. While everyone's grieving process is personal, remembering that you have each other can provide comfort and strength during this tough time. Finding meaning is helpful for everyone affected by a loss. Each person having a voice of how they are struggling and sharing feelings is important to supporting everyone involved.
What will my life be like now?
This question often leads people to seek counseling after a loss. Life is a journey we all walk, and reaching out for support is like having someone walk alongside you as you navigate this new path. We will explore these questions and find answers that unfold as we work together.
Next Steps
Moving forward takes time, and there is no predefined timeline that applies to everyone. Moving on doesn't mean forgetting; it means rediscovering how to live our lives with a new perspective.
In some ways, moving on can bring a sense of peace as we carry memories forward in meaningful ways. Grief counseling provides support so that you do not have to navigate this journey alone.
Let us start this healing journey together by contacting me directly at 317-891-5793 or by reaching out today!